


Sins and Monsters

by type_username_here



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, BAMF Stiles, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotionally Hurt Stiles Stilinski, Fluff and Angst, Good Theo Raeken, Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt Stiles Stilinski, Hurt/Comfort, Immortality, Let's go bois, M/M, Magical Stiles Stilinski, Monsters, Murder, Nogitsune, Nogitsune Effects, Nogitsune Stiles Stilinski, Nogitsune Trauma, Panic, Panic Attacks, Poetic, Poetry, Post-Nogitsune, Post-Nogitsune Stiles Stilinski, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Powerful Stiles Stilinski, Protective Theo Raeken, Psychological Torture, Psychological Trauma, Psychopath Theo Raeken, REEEEEEE, Regret, Spark Stiles Stilinski, The Author Regrets Everything, Theo Raeken Needs a Hug, Trauma, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Unhealthy Relationships, wrote this in like 40 minutes max
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-24
Updated: 2020-04-24
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:35:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23826187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/type_username_here/pseuds/type_username_here
Summary: Stiles had been a murderer before he was a murderer. He had held blades and had run with the wind long before he had chosen to. Stiles had all of a dark spirits’ memory as if they were his own, every destructive spell and mean trick. He knew how to kill and how to lie, how to hide bodies and how to make others immortal and make the strongest soldiers spill every secret.He is not the Nogistune, but he might as well be.
Relationships: Theo Raeken/Stiles Stilinski
Comments: 2
Kudos: 71





	Sins and Monsters

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this quick-quick off of like two Pinterest prompts at midnight so... yeah. :/
> 
> I am kinda happy with it though, so I hope you enjoy it too!  
> *Also, there's like... the beginnings of a panic attack? so if you think that this might trigger you at all BE CAREFUL!* >:(
> 
> *Also Also, I didn't do a great spell check on this, so if you find any errors, feel free to let me know! :)*

_ This is wrong. _

It's the only thing that runs through Stiles' mind as his pinkie brushes across Theos’ hand.

_ Oh, but how could something so wonderful be wrong? _

Theos’  breath comes out in little puffs and his face is the most relaxed that Stiles has ever  seen it . The thought brings  a  grin to his face as he looks down at the sleeping boy. The grin  isn’t one of a  love-sick  teenager ,  more on the ironic side if anything.  Maybe even a little broken.  But what could  you  have expected from such broken people?

After all ,  as Stiles ran his fingers over the others’ hands, he traced his fingers through  the  remnants of crimes and sins so  numerous that neither could  keep count . He  passed over  molecules and atoms that  were once people’s blood , and innards , and muscles and bones .

~~ All  of them dead . ~~

But Stiles is no better.

No .

H e is just as bad .

Stiles had been a murderer before he was a murderer. He had held blades and had run with the wind long before he had chosen to. He had felt  slick , warm blood drip down his face .  Felt as it traced every hard edge and soft lin e of a million faces ~~-~~ ~~ a million lives lived ~~ ,  had tasted it o n his lips and had  _ smiled _ . He had watched through his own eyes, sobbing and pleading as he stabbed nurses and doctors –people he knew- and best friends and girls and boys and their eyes all look ed the same once they  went  blank and  he  c ouldn’t  distinguish the faces that flash ed through his mind anymore , and he  was  sixteen, but  once, he was a child, but he  was  seventy before that ,  and will live for eternity , but he  won’t -not anymore . Who is he now ? He ha d spent more time  in the body of a  thirty-year-old man than in the one he looks down  at -where is he? Wh ere was  his magic? Swirling dark and deep  through his very core . What is this new power wrapped around his bones and infuse d in his muscles ? What is he this time? A Spark? A  warrior? A witch? Wh -

...

Theo is holding his wrist and his eyes  burn with knowing.

That's right. 

His na m e is Stiles now , and he was human long before he was the  Nogistune .

B ut the  Nogistune was  a monster  long before he was Stiles.

And Stiles has had all of it stuffed into his head.  Thousands and thousands of years of darkness and torment, hurt and pain .  He can  recall  dozens of lives , all his own. All  ones that he had lived.

Only he ha dn’t really.

Stiles has all of a dark spirits’ memory as if they are his own, every destructive spell and mean trick. He knows how to kill and how to lie, how to hide bodies and how to make others immortal and force secrets out of the strongest truth-keepers. ~~Stiles-no~~ ~~.~~ **He** knows so much more now. He can switch from language to languagewith too much ease, can remember monsters that no hunter has ever heard of. Sometimes, he can catch himself thinking in Japanese instead of English ~~because sixteen years of a language will never measure up to a few hundred of another.~~

Is this what it means to be immortal?

…

He thinks  that maybe it is.

He doesn’t like it.

It scares him . W hat he can do now .

W hat he  ** is  ** now.

He is a monster like none other and it 's  horrifying .

It doesn’t scare Theo.

Theo , who  has lived his life surrounded by monsters and failed experiments.

Theo, who is broken and mean, in a different  sort  of way than Stiles . His strength comes from  young  aggression, rage , fueled by still-fresh- betrayal and frustration . He still likes to  dream  of lives that he could have had, has the energy to scream  out when everything  feels like too much . H e still likes to play with prey before he goes in for the kill and still find s it in him to  keep up his masks when others are looking .

Theo is a murderer. He’s vicious and ruthless and doesn’t regret his actions  as long as  it gets him what he wants.

Stiles can appreciate that now, can  relate to that,  ** needs  ** that.

They are both monsters, trying so hard to forget their pasts, trying to right  wrongs .

So , they will grin with  wicked teeth and too-sharp minds.  They w ill tear each other apart and scream  each other's names until their throats are raw and  they  can't re member anything else . U ntil they are both red with lust and hatred , t hey will carve themselves into each other and the universe and everything else with nails and claws alike.

Because there is nobody innocent amongst them.

Maybe there never w as .

_ This is wrong. _

_B_ _ ut how could something so wonderful be wrong? _

**Author's Note:**

> Ok.  
> So like,  
> It's always kind of bugged me how Stiles gets possessed by this supposedly immortal creature and doesn't seem to really pick up any ticks or habits from it. He definitely is more mature, but the same could be said for the rest of the characters as well (they do deal with a lot of dark stuff). I like to think that the Nogistune picks up its' victims' memories and when it possessed Stiles, he leaves behind his personality with Stiles. So they're some weird mash-up. Like Stiles is still Stiles, but he's also the Nogistune now.  
> ...if that kinda makes sense. :/
> 
> And then, halfway through writing this, I thought of that one scene where Theo tells Stiles that he came to Beacon Hill for the Nogistune or a darker Stiles. so there are a few ways to interpret it I guess, either Stiles took him up on the offer, or maybe this takes place after? I leave it up to the reader to decide and I would love to read your opinions in the comments!  
> Thank you so much for reading and I hope you have a lovely day!  
> here's an aesthetic board for this: https://www.pinterest.ca/FictionalAesthetics/sins-and-monster/  
> :)


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